Its that time of year again. Oi... lol

Just pasting my wall post from FB here 'cuz it says it all.

Just finished up all the lil details that *I* need to do for the SR this year and I'm not to surprised at the end product. I'm leaving the gas figures to John. As I was sitting here knee deep in mapquest, hotel addresses, room prices and dates, John who is on the couch playing WoW says that I'm great at this planing stuff and could do it for a living. Thx for saying so John but ummm no thx. It is as Ina said last time (or the time before I can't tell) my mother bird phase in the trip and doings. If I don't then it will never get done lol. Now just to wait for it to get close so I can go into panic mood and start doing the packing (or should I say bugging them to get packed) and entertainment and food ready. *sigh* more planing.

Today

So today I feel *slightly* better then I do most days. I think the reason is that I (per my meds councilor's permission) upped my amount of the current meds. Not that I feel better/normal in a oh say jumping for joy kinda way but I'll take any lil bit I can get. Maybe it will get even better after I've been at the higher dosage for oh say a week or so. I mean a crazy gurl can always hope, right?

Also I did something I have not done in more then a month and a half. I watched a animated (CGI) film. Most of the time things to unrealistic inflames my damn DP. though this time it pulled me away from dwelling on my DP and into the story and even got me laughing and chuckling. It was "Kung-fo Panda". Really funny and cute. I now want to (and wish I had it here) watch "The Furious Five" spin-off. It looks funny and fun.

I need fun and laughter.

I've been thinking about picking up the book "The Hometown Weekly" by Bruce Lindsay. It kinda like "A Parry Home Companion" on NPR/PRI. Yeah it is mellow but, that is what I'm going for. I mean Hells bells I would love to be able to finish "The Stand" by Stephen King but, from what I gather and what the DP manual says mellow is the way to go to get out from under this cack. I don't want to inflame this stuff since when I do I just have to ride it out as I have found NO way to lessen it when it spikes at all. If anyone does then please tell me I would love to know. Hell any advice on this cack (good, helpful advice) is more then welcome!

One thing that has been getting to me in a major way other then the crushing unreality and fear is the fact that I'm very, VERY tired ALL THE TIME -_-...

I mean WTH!? I do almost nothing most days other then keep my mind busy and thus my butt not moving and yet I still feel like I've stayed up all night and way running errands all day. This sux soooo bad! (though I would trade even more tiredness for any extra relief from this DP/DR crap)

Now I'm bored with most everything and feel way to worn out to read my books (though they are good reads) and thus my mind wanders down that frakked up road in my head and stares at the damned black mass that is DP/DR and ponders on it.

*sigh*

It sux when you look forward every morning to just going back to bed to escape this cack. And even worse my sleep over the last two days has been HORRIBLE! I keep waking up and tossing and turning.

>.> Oh well each day moves me a tad closer to escaping this (I hope).

Feeling drained

I just got done helping Rachel and she kinda blew it off as nothing and went image surfing for pics of her boy toy crush 'The Judist Brothers' while I scanned Beowulf for phrases that would fit her HW.

....more then an hour later after finding all she needed but one I got sick of her thinking my help was nothing and her wasting time on the interweb and tossed the book back at her and told her to find it herself.

She said "should I ask the others (family) to find it then"? >.> ummm no as you are in an honors class you SHOULD be doing it yourself not looking for more images of that damned band to slather all over your notebook.

She looked for a few mins and then just stuck crap in the last spot and then gathered up her crap and left my room.



I'm sorry but if I'm helping you with something and you think my help is nothing worth while and you don't show me that you appreciate it then just go bump it on down the road and don't ask for my help.

I'm tired and worn out and feel dead so with bleary eyes and a belittled smack to the face I was not going to take it.

It shows that I've been worn out by my midterm crap and I was just not going to take her crap.....

uggg venting it feels good!


LOL its days like these that I'm glad that I have nonsensical fuzzy eared hats to jam on my head and make people wonder about my sanity ^_^

*YAWN*

*dies*

Done with lots of school work now to bed.

Night night...

zzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzz